Monday, June 20, 2011

Fail to the king (Duke nukem forever review)

There are lots of iconic and well loved video game characters out there, they all have different genres and we love them for different reasons. Normally the icons of the gaming world are backed by amazing videogames witch is why the characters are so popular, examples of this are everywhere from Master chief of the now legendary Halo series to the up and coming characters like nathan drake from the uncharted series. The developers behind these epic games work extremly hard to ensure a bad game doesint hurt the image of a growing gaming superstar and so creators like bungie and naughty dog keep the franchise under close watch..

Duke nukem was/is one of these iconic characters, for those who dont know much about the self proclaimed king he started out in 1991 and starred in a string of games by the now deceased 3D realms. The biggest hit of the series Duke Nukem 3D is considered by some to be a game that helped revolutionize first person shooters as a genre. Dukes tough guy swagger and edgey gameplay earned him the namesake that fans have faithfully kept till today.....12 years later. Unfortunately duke hit hard times after Nukem 3D, 3D Relms attempted to make a sequel but was unable to and shortly after closed its doors for good, this left the Duke nukem franchise in the lowest circle of development hell where it remained resting not so peacefully until 2k games and gearbox software decided to go grave diving.

This bring us to the recent release of Duke nukem forever, warning to all nukem fans this will not be easy to read. Right from the opening cutscene everything about this game screams the 90's from dukes announcemnet that "he's back baby" to the boring guitar ripps. The games story is extremly forgettable and boring, the basic premise is that duke has been in development hell, I mean on "vacation" and is called back into the line of duty when the aliens he defeated 12 years ago find there way back to earth for revenge (what took them so long?)and this time they start going after earth’s women. From there the game sends you on your way through an reletively short and extremly linear story where there is no such thing as exploration except for the random bathroom where u can take a piss or a vending machine, im serious its less of a story or adventure and more of move from point A to point B while annihilating anything that comes onscreen that is not human.



While you can make the argument that most fps give you that task it isint this blatant and normally the story is what keeps you moving forward with a sense of purpose, all of which are missing in this game. Crappy graphics also add to the frustration of this game, forever looks extremly dated ancient almost which really makes me wonder what gearbox and 2k changed about the game if anything. Duke nukem forever looks like a game that should have been released for the original xbox or ps2, with all the beautiful games that have been released (Halo reach, Uncharted 2, Mass effect series) and games starting to utilize 3D Tv it really makes forever look decrepit.

The creators at 2k and gearbox were also extremly unimaginative with charater design, for how much the game boast about big guns, expolsive action and hot babes there is a very short order of any of them in the game, especially the women duke games are infamously known for. All the women in the game are pretty much carbon copys of eachother, same build maybe even the same voice actor, even the two leading ladies duke regularly interacts with are twins to show the lack of effort on the developers part. But the biggest gripe has to be the fact that in the entire game there are less than a handful of enimies to fight, this make combat feel mind numbing, very repetitive and worst of all boring. The controls are very basic and if you have played a FPS in the past decade should be no problem for you and the puzzels in the game are so simple they almost go without mentioning.





Forever also falls flat when it comes to voice acting and sound, one of the things that has kept duke alive all this time in the hearts and minds of gamers are the chuck Norris like duke-isms that are all over the web and that SHOULD be in the game, that is not the case honestly that is the farthest from the truth. Duke's boring one liners are seemingly set on repeat the entire game, sure it sounds cool at first but by the 500th time you have heard duke say "Let God sort out the mess" on the second level your about ready to play the game on mute. Add to this shitstorm of a game an unimaginative multiplayer that consist of slayer, team slayer and a duke version of CTF called capture the babe and you have a full on epic fail of a game and more importantly a waste of 63.59. (The price of games since the new console generation) If your a fan rent but please save yourself the buyers remorse and don’t purchase this game.

Its a shame that this is the offering the faithful fans of duke nukem get after all these years, and its obvious that instead of being real developers and creating a game with there own imagination while staying true to the iconic character; 2k and gearbox decided to simply spit shine and ship out a game THAT WASINT GOOD ENOUGH TO CUT IT IN THE MID 90's!!!!
Seriously this is the same game that 3D realms tried with all there might to ship out but could not and now we see why...12 years later. The same flaws that plagued it then are glaringly obvious now with new technology and games evolving in every aspect. I don’t know if duke will ever get another shot at gaming redemption or if the iconic character will have to burn for the sins of his developers, I guess we will have to wait and see if dukes fans can pull him out of the 50ft ditch 2k and gearbox dug for him. For its boring story, dated graphics and sheer lack of effort in development duke nukem gets a 2 out of 5

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